The Yin and Yang of Love and Fear

Hey! I hope you are all doing really well. Welcome back to another twin flame energy update. I've got a few things to talk about that are very profound and can really help you understand this whole twin flame experience a little better. 

Once again, I am going to be turning a few of the twin flame "rules" or supposed "truths" on their head. For many twin flames, now is the time when they are ready to get real and see beyond the illusions that blocked us for so long. These self-delusions are crumbling so fast and it's freeing us from the stagnation that seemed to endure for a very long time in the past. What I have to divulge will likely trigger some of you, but in no way am I intending to blame the DF; I am merely attempting to bring subconscious patterns to the surface for recognition and subsequent shifts for the highest good of all.

I'm going to talk about some insights that carry on from my last energy report about the hidden masks both twins wear and how they reflect the inner fears that they both have surrounding the connection. For such a long time many divine feminine's were totally blind to their own masks; all they could see were the divine masculine's masks. It really is such an illusion to believe it's only the DM who has things to heal and had got stuck in resistance. It goes both ways. Both twins have fears about being vulnerable and truly seen by the other. But it's such a powerful time right now because the DF's are being honest with themselves and can see these inner blocks in order to release them. 

I can see now that for this whole time I was waiting for my twin flame to become real, to come out from behind his mask before I was fully willing to be authentic and vulnerable with him in return. I had no idea that I was also wearing a mask to try and protect myself as I waited for him to release his fears. Of course, he was doing the exact same thing! He was waiting for me to be my true self before he could feel comfortable opening his heart. Both of us were holding back and waiting for the other to go first before we could allow ourselves to fully trust in the other, trust in the love and the connection. We were both stuck in a Mexican standoff, observing the other through the eye holes of our own masks, wondering when the other was going to start being real and initiate the process of authenticity so we could move forward together. 

According to Wikipedia,

A Mexican standoff is a confrontation in which no strategy exists that allows any party to achieve victory. As a result, all participants need to maintain the strategic tension, which remains unresolved until some outside event makes it possible to resolve it.

This is certainly what happened between my twin and I. My twin flame was the one to go first and speak his truth, for which, I am very grateful. This caused a tower moment that was designed to shake and wake us up. Neither of us had been willing to let down our guard for so long so we were forced into it. I had no idea just how much of a mask I was wearing until that tower moment struck and completely demolished it. I guess, for that whole time that I had been wearing it, a part of me didn't fully believe in the twin flame thing or the mirror effect so I thought I could just "get away with" wearing my mask and just wait for my twin to become real first. My ego was telling me that these universal laws of mirroring didn't apply to me so I was technically trying to trick or shortcut the universe out of doing my work - "Oh it's probably just some new age mumbo jumbo talk." It's funny how we can have many layers existing within us at the same time; part of us believing, part of us not. 

I look back and I realise that I was in a profound state of denial about my own healing needs because I had resistance because it's scary and messy to go inwards. I felt safer just pretending to myself and to my twin that it was mostly just him who needed to heal. I was afraid of having responsibility for the state of our connection and union, so I subconsciously shirked my healing needs and placed the weight of that upon his shoulders instead. I feel that many divine feminine's do this subconsciously from a place of fear. I have come to the conclusion that for myself, my fear of taking responsibility for my side of the union resided in a belief that I'd fail at the task. My mask helped me to blind myself from this insecurity and just wait for my twin to sort everything out instead.

Many feminine twins become preoccupied with focusing on what the divine masculine needs to heal as a subconscious way to avoid the pain of looking inwards and feeling overwhelmed with the array of wounds lurking within our own shadows. When we make the divine masculine solely responsible for the outcome of the union, then a part of us believes that we can avoid feeling like we ourselves could potentially fuck up. Forcing the masculine the bare the weight of this unrealistic expectation is the very thing that overwhelms them because they literally cannot do it all by themselves. DF's are very good at making it appear that we are ahead of the game to further support this delusion. The TF community is rife with such condescension of the masculine. As divine feminine's, many of us have built ourselves up and it's all down to the ego, whilst we claim it's solely the DM stuck in ego. But in truth we are equals, mirrors; it cannot be any other way for we are One.

We're all learning to feel our way out of the darkness of illusion into the light of truth. We look outside of ourselves and see the stubbornness of the masculine whilst resisting the truth of our own. We think it's the masculine who lets us down, but we equally let them down too. Then we wonder why things aren't moving forward, or appear to go backwards. It appears on the surface that the masculine is the one running away from his healing by distracting himself in the 3D in certain ways, but it is a reflection of how we too are also running away from our own healing and simply pointing the finger at him. We kid ourselves that we are being very spiritual and are more enlightened for we talk a lot about healing and may even meditate and perform certain healing modalities on ourselves, and many times I have heard readers talking about sending the DM healing energy, when really we need to be focusing on our own healing. But there is often still a level of resistance and delusion towards our own healing because we subconsciously do not know how to heal the deepest wounds, or we may not even know what our wounds are at the time. Much of this is done subconsciously, so in that sense it is not our fault. But in understanding our own blindness, can we not also be understanding of the DM's lack of inner knowing at times?

For our ego it's easy to blame the DM for the ways in which his soul uses his 3D self to trigger us to finally wake up. It's easy to point the finger at the other and say "they fucked up" so we can continue to let our ego protect us from the pain of looking honestly at ourselves and the equal part we play in the connection and what's transpiring. How convenient it is for us to delude ourselves in this way to continue to avoid taking responsibility of going inwards. (BTW, I am not blaming the DF! We are equal, equally accountable for everything, whether we like it or not).

No wonder the DM's have felt insecure that they do not have enough to offer the DF, because with such unrealistic expectations placed upon him, he knows he cannot fulfil this delusion to be the one to bare the weight of the whole connection. Again, it appears on the surface that it's the divine feminine doing all the work in the connection, but in truth, many have simply put on a subconscious masquerade of being "the perfect DF", i.e. mothering the DM etc etc, because "we are more enlightened and therefore must help him grow up." whilst conveniently bypassing our own needs for healing. (Again, there's all different levels to this and it's not so black and white, but I think you understand my over all meaning.) It really has been such a disservice to the masculine for many DF's to have painted them out the be the villain. (Not saying DF's are the villain either. Both have room for improvement!)

So, when it came to my twin flame and myself, we'd both got too comfortable talking to each other through a wall. We spent years trying to feel each other out in this guarded way. "Who is he / she really?" we'd be asking ourselves. (The whole time I thought that was just me asking that about him.) I knew he had trust issues surrounding me but I didn't really understand that it was because I was wearing a mask. "Will his / her fears / mask cause them to hurt me? Cause them to run? Cause them to invalidate the connection and make me feel rejected? He / she is obviously in some kind of denial of the truth about everything right now, so I am not safe to be true and vulnerable because the other isn't willing to be true and vulnerable at this time. Therefore they will reject me in my truth and our truth." 

There was no stability in this falseness of our masks, no true grounding. Both could see the other's fear and thought the other's insecurity may shake the foundations so much so that it would possibly cause everything to completely crumble if one was to step forward before the other was ready. It also felt like a rejection to us both when we felt the other didn't trust us enough to be their true and authentic selves. Such trust issues create a gap between the two and so on a deep level it felt like the other was abandoning us.  

So much fear is triggered in these connections and a very important download came to me about this. And it's all to do with the law of opposites, or polarity as some people call it. What spirit showed me is that in these twin flame connections, if we desire to experience the deepest love, we must also embrace the biggest fears. Relationships with little fear can often mean there's little love involved (not always, but often it's the case). If there's little love for our partner then we aren't fearful of losing them, or about what they think of us (hence one of the reasons why some twins get into karmic relationships because there's no real fear of loss or separation triggered in those connections).  But there will always be great fear stirred up where there is great love. On this 3D planet, where we are conditioned to believe in separation, when we are faced with the deepest possibility of Oneness in the twin flame union, then we also become acutely aware of this fear of separation just as equally; that we may be separated from our beloved through some kind of rejection. 

So what is this fear exactly, that comes up from experiencing the deepest love with our twin flame? The fear is a belief that we need something and that we won't receive the very thing we think we need. It can also be that we fear that the thing we believe we need will be taken away from us. So within these connections, these fears are often about believing we need to be with our twin flame, that we need their love and approval, that they are the one's to prove our worth to us.  When we have these false beliefs to do with looking outside of ourselves for validation and wholeness, then we become extremely anxious that we either won't receive what we perceive to need from our twin, or that if we do receive it then later on it will be taken away from us.

What's come up through these recent tower moments and awakening, is the awareness of, "Do I really need these things to be happy?" For when we realise that we don't need them to be happy and that happiness comes from within and we actually do the work to make that inner joy a reality, then we release the fear that kept us stuck and stagnant for so long, that kept our hearts shielded. And then a curious thing happens; when we no longer need someone outside of ourselves to make us happy and we have become self-reliant in fulfilling our own core needs in this way, our neediness disappears, the delusions where we place these needs all upon the other's shoulders fall away. We have therefore taken the unrealistic burdens off of the other's shoulders and they are liberated and they no longer feel burdened by the doubt that they "aren't enough" for the DF. She has finally taken care of her own needs, which are her needs to take care of. He can then see that she isn't a bottomless pit of insecurities that she's looking to him to fill in for her. She is now in a place of being realistic. The DM must do the same. He cannot place his worth on how she relates to him, his happiness and security on her being there for him in the 3D and validating him in certain ways. 

When we seek the comfort of the ego mask and the walls it creates around ourselves in order to hide from or repress our fears and the pain it causes, we are equally hiding from love. When we grab onto a false sense of certainty, either through wearing masks to keep a sense of control, by living in a fantasy where we're always safe, or by getting into another relationship where our fears aren't triggered so we don't feel off centre, we block the powerful flow of real love. We are trying to contain something that cannot be contained. When we try to suffocate the fears we also suffocate the love.  

If we want the deepest love, we must also be willing to face the deepest fear, or live a sedated life, a safe life, with the colours and vibrancy turned down, dull. Our souls become restless in such scenarios of resistance. Our souls long for Oneness, truth, to grow beyond the 3D laws of polarity into the 5D reality of Oneness. 

A large part of the excitement of the twin flame connection is it's power to encompass the full spectrum of the polarity of love and fear, the yin and yang that is One. On this Earth plane, without one (love) there cannot be the other (fear) and vice versa. It's this contrast of the polarities that makes us feel most alive. How can we experience and appreciate the deepest of love and oneness if we are not simultaneously made aware of the opposite, the fear of separation from it? The polarity heightens it all and for many it's very overwhelming to begin with when there is a lack of faith in the connection or a belief that validation must come from the other. The fear is so intense it can really trick us into believing it's a life or death situation whether we get that validation from our twin or not. 

But the truth is, our twin flame connection is supposed to bring up all of these fears to show us the ways in which we are still blinded by the illusion of separation, blinded by trying to feel inner joy by looking for it outwardly. The very depth of the love we feel rouses the equal amount of fear due to the law of polarity. This is what brings our illusions into the light of awareness so we can transcend the separation illusion and ascend into the higher realms of Oneness, bringing it back down and living it in the 3D.  

When we don't realise that it's not only normal, but intended for us to feel such deep fear in our twin flame connection; to feel insecure, off balance, scared and doubtful, then our mind can begin to doubt the connection's validity altogether. This can lead us to believe that because there are many obstacles in overcoming these fears in the connection then there must be something wrong with this connection, that it's not real love. But the whole point of relationships, and especially the twin flame connection, is to challenge us to become more of our true selves. 

On a collective scale, the majority of people believe that love relationships should be blissful all the time. Deep down we know that relationships take work, but secretly we believe they shouldn't be difficult or full of challenges. But this is how our soul grows. This is not the bog standard cookie cutter type relationship that's deemed "normal" by a sleeping society. We are here to transcend those limiting moulds.

I mean, how many of you have gone to your friends for advice about your twin flame (not a good idea!) for them to tell you that maybe you should give up on this "unhealthy" relationship and instead try and date someone else where you can have the bog standard setup? They equate a healthy relationship to fit the mould of everything running smoothly as you graduate through certain checkpoints, moving in together, getting married, having kids, watching TV every evening after coming home from the rat race etc etc. Now, all of these things are fine and maybe even desirable even for twin flames, but, these friends don't have the ability to see that your connection is SO MUCH MORE than just these bog standard aspects. But it becomes clear that as a whole, society expects a healthy relationship to look very different from your twin flame connection. (I am not advocating putting up with abuse or unhealthy situations. I am merely saying that what other's might see as unhealthy in your connection can literally be the triggers that help both the twin's grow on such a deep soul level).  

In truth, you will face your greatest challenges for soul growth within your greatest love connections. And these often encompass our deepest fears and learning to overcome them, for your twin flame has the potential to bring you to the heights of deepest joy and the depths of pain. And they will. That is why the twin flame connection is the most coveted of all experiences. And also why it's the most challenging. 

Yes these connections are meant to be beautiful and full of joy, but we need to be realistic and know that any kind of love relationship has it's other side of the story, the polarity. The more connected you are, the more your fears are going to be triggered to the surface. And when this happens your ego is going to step in and tell you things like, "I'm not good enough. He's / she's going to reject me." and we begin to really believe this inner panic as absolute truth as we spiral into painful and destructive feelings such as doubt, fear, rejection, confusion, anger and pain. In such times it's sometimes a real challenge to keep our hearts open and allow ourselves to remain authentic and vulnerable. The ego wants to protect us and that's when a mask comes up, a wall. We start believing we must become someone different to our true selves in order to be worthy.

This is what was happening for many twin flames for a very long time. It was unconscious. It caused running on both sides. But now, with the clarity that the tower moment has brought, we are at a time in our evolution where we can become more conscious when these fears comes up. We can actually know that we have a choice. We can choose to listen to these ego fears and believe them to be reality, causing us to doubt ourselves, our twin flame and the connection and feeling overwhelmed with discomfort. Or we can choose to see that these deep fears are simply the indication of how deeply we love our twin flame. 

Because we feel most vulnerable and open with our twin flame, we can become easily engulfed by the fears. But this isn't the result of there being something wrong (unless it's an abusive connection), in fact it's the indication of the depth of love you feel, and being in 3D, the equal amount of the polarity you experience with that as fear. 

Our second choice is to choose love over the fear. To understand that fear is going to come up but it's only an indication that we are intensely anxious that our needs aren't going to be met. But again, that's when we need to realise that we must meet our own needs. Whenever a fear comes up ask yourself what you think you are needing. Ask yourself, "Do I really need that (from this other person)?" Whatever the need is, know that you can give that to yourself and that you must give that to yourself first and foremost, otherwise you will always feel afraid and insecure looking outside of yourself for validation. 

We must cultivate the inner knowing that we are not less than or inadequate, that we cannot be crushed if our twin doesn't validate us. Our self love must come from within. Remembering this truth of our soul again and again and again is the key to dissolving our fears. It allows us to remain open and to follow our heart. This is how we continue to grow and ascend. 

With this knowledge of the purpose of our connection being to bring our fears and illusions to the surface for clearing, we can stay open and aware. These connections give us the opportunity to fall down so many times in order to keep getting up again, all the while getting closer and closer to the realisation of our true self. It takes a lot of courage and commitment. True love isn't meant to be easy. It's job is to prise us away from our own limitations, comfort zones and illusions, stirring us into an even deeper sense of Love and Self.  

When we both surrender to love in this way, then we are free of the fears that held us back from union for so long. We have united with ourselves, seeing beyond the 3D illusion of separation and aligned with the 5D truth of Oneness. It takes time and it's okay to accept that along the way the fears will keep coming up at different times, you don't need to be perfect at it, and you won't be perfect, none of us are. It's all about being aware of the fears, that they just indicate some need we must strive to fulfil within ourselves. Then we are ready for union with our twin flame in the 3D. This is what they mean in law of attraction talk, when they say that needing something to manifest so badly actually prevents it from manifesting.  Release the need, then you release the fear that stifles you. 

If you would like more help on how to release these intense fears and subsequently release the blocks to union then I have created a very powerful Mediation Activation called "Fearless Faith: I AM Safe to Trust - Powerful Block Removal Activation". In this 40 minute meditation I gently guide you to understanding what you believe your biggest needs are from your twin flame and how to release them, knowing you can provide all of those needs for yourself. This helps to release the fears and the tendency to cling on too tightly to your twin and allows you to reach inner wholeness. This inner union actually allows outer union with your twin flame to flow in naturally if that is part of your shared soul contract. Releasing these intense fears and all of the anxiety is such a huge relief and is very liberating. To purchase the meditation for only $11.11 USD, please see below. 

Love and Light to you on your continued journey,

​Karen x

Fearless Faith: I AM Safe to Trust - Powerful Block Removal Activation MP3

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One of our biggest fears surrounding our twin flame connection is often the idea that union will never happen. This fear stirs up all sorts of painful emotions - abandonment, rejection, terror, heartbreak - no fun at all! To make matters worse, our fears make us act in all sorts of desperate ways that actually push away our twin flame - paranoia, jealousy, clingyness, bitterness etc. Our inner child is crying out to be loved in all the ways we felt abandoned and rejected in childhood.

When we yearn so badly for outer validation from our twin to the point of feeling desperate, energetically this repels union because we mistakenly believe we NEED union in order to feel happy, whole, loved etc, but our soul is trying to teach us to first align with union within - taking responsibility for our own emotional wellbeing.

In this meditation I take you to the heart of your fears. Instead of avoiding the fears by looking outside of yourself to your twin for validation and thus continuing to block the union, we will explore integrating these fears. Through allowing ourselves to get more comfortable with the possibility of life without union, with being happy and fulfilled regardless of what happens with our twin flame, we release the fears and allow the flow of our highest good to come into our lives. This opens us up to receiving union with our twin, if that is for our highest good. If not, then we have created a space to become fulfilled and happy within ourselves and our lives regardless, so it's a win-win situation!

Through releasing the fears and knowing you will be okay, more than okay, if union didn't happen, you reach inner union. You know that you are always in control of your perspective of how you see and live your life and so you can be happy if you choose to be no matter what.

This meditation activation removes the fears, brings you comfort and allows you to relax and align with inner union and outer union.

40 mins length

For legal reasons I must state that this MP3 is for entertainment purposes only. 

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